


nature's candy!

by windsilk



Series: just don't close your heart [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, Gen, Humor, Not all heroes wear capes, parks and recreation - Freeform, sasuke isn't the chris traeger we need but he's the chris traeger we deserve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2018-12-12
Packaged: 2019-09-16 19:37:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16960248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/windsilk/pseuds/windsilk
Summary: Naruto suffers. Sakura suffers in solidarity. Sasuke has raisins.





	nature's candy!

naruto flopped backward onto the grass, a high pitched whine beginning to take shape in the recesses of his throat. “sakura, if I die, all of my belongings can go to you. except my roomba. I want that to be buried with me to take to heaven.”

sakura sighed, twirling a twig in between her fingers. “you’re not a pharoah. you can’t bring stuff to the afterlife.” she paused, her own stomach rumbling. “and you are not going to die of hunger. I’m sure neji will finish cooking…eventually…”

she peered across the park to where neji was grilling. he had been cutting up all of these vegetables she’d never eaten–rutabagas, kale, and rampion galore. and lots and lots of avocados. (“they’re excellent for your hair,” he’d declared with a meaningful look towards her head.

she’d spent the next half hour critically examining the strands in the front facing camera of her phone.)

“I’m going to die,” naruto insisted. “if not from starvation, then from poisoning. does neji even know how to cook? I thought he came from some snooty family where they only go to whole foods.”

sakura rolled her eyes and opened her mouth to reply when–

“hey. hey.” sakura turned just in time to see sasuke hustling towards them, dropping onto his knees in front of her. unbidden, her cheeks warmed.

in a low tone, he began: “so I know neji doesn’t want us to eat anything before his food, but I smuggled in some candy.”

naruto shot up from where he was decomposing on the ground. “oh, thank god, I’m starving.”

hands outstretched, naruto waited for the candy to be deposited. sasuke rustled around in his pockets and pulled out two small boxes, handing one to sakura and one to naruto.

naruto ripped into the box eagerly, and a flurry of wrinkled, dark fruits tumbled out. a beat passed, and naruto visibly wilted. “aw, man, raisins?”

sasuke nodded sagely. “it’s nature’s candy.”   
sakura was already halfway through the box. the sweet flavor burst in her mouth, quelling the complaints, at least temporarily, of her fussy stomach.

“now they’re basically grapes, so remember to pace yourself.” sasuke paused, taking in his own words, and then upturned the whole box into his mouth at once.

sakura’s eyebrows disappeared in her hair, pausing mid-chew. “uh.”

naruto looked more and more appalled with every passing minute.

sasuke chewed rapidly. “I can’t even follow my own advice. it’s so delicious!” and then he stood, looking strangely pleased with himself, and walked away.

naruto flopped back onto the grass again. “I hate that guy.”

sakura hummed and then eyed his untouched box. “can I have yours?”

naruto moaned loudly. “I’m going to die.”

**Author's Note:**

> (see also: parks and rec or https://youtu.be/tZx8FvbMwzo)


End file.
